THE CAPTAIN AND HIS MATEY!
EYE SEE YOU
I STILL THINK FOOD ART WILL CATCH ON
BOYS AND THEIR TOYS
WE WERE ONLY DOING 2 MPH AT THE TIME
I WAS THERE AND I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT THE BEAR WAS DOING
THIS WAS DONE BY A PLASTIC SURGEON!
SOME PEOPLE WILL BEND OVER BACKWARDS FOR YOU
CAN I COME IN PLEASE?
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More Snow Expected for Ice Bound Kentucky:- I have seen pictures and videos of what Kentuckians are now enduring and all I can say is - PUSSIES!!
Octuplet mom wants to be parenting star- If she keeps spitting them out 8 at a time one of them is bound to be a star
Tot mom's lawyer delivered contraband- Big Billy didn't even know that the Contra's could sing
CNNMoney: The cleanest vehicles on the road- Are not the ones that park in Big Billy's driveway...
'Batman' Bale lets F-bombs fly on movie set- Why the f*ck is this news?
Halftime water-escape stunt goes wrong- The water remained trapped in the pitcher for hours
From $100,000 a year to unemployed- No matter how high up the ladder an individual climbs, the bottom is still in the same place for all of us
Don't Go to Work if You Are Sick - I don't know who wrote this one but I will give you good odds it wasn't a boss
Man found stuck in chimney- Homeowner finally called officials after the sleigh and eight reindeer had been on his roof for a month
From FOXNEWS.com:
Ex-Detroit Mayor Released After 99-Day Jail Stay- Says he plans on running for Governor of Illinois
Madonna Reportedly Dating Jesus- Wouldn't that be incest?
Study: Teen Pot Smoking Down in U.S., Overseas- Evidently Michael Phelps didn't get the e-mail
Today's WTF:
]]>Jack Bauer still rules.
Hours after flight 1549 hit the water, Connecticut lottery officials announce that the lottery pick 1549 had sold out and could no longer be picked for that day. Officials say the state has a liability limit of $8 million dollars and, once the potential winnings for a single pick reaches that amount, the system automatically halts sales on that number. And silly old me thought that lotteries were random.
When he heard that flight 1549 was brought down by birds, G'Dub called for an immediate invasion of Birdlandia.
A Spartanburg,S.C. man, concerned about the safety of his 6 year old niece, took his .45 caliber handgun out from under the couch and started to unload it. The gun went off and the little girl was killed. When this kind of tragic accident happens, why is the business end always pointed in the wrong direction?
The Department of Homeland Security needs to immediately launch an investigation on what could possibly be a terrorist attack on the one of the most basic elements of the American way of life. This is worse than the possible attack on water supplies. It could disrupt our entire social economic structure. Somebody needs to take immediate action and make it safe te eat peanut butter again!
]]>I have had on and off again problems with a relationship for a long time. Oh, it seemed the relationship was good. I seemed happy when we were together. And, for the most part, I was. Some of the best times of my life have been centered around this relationship, but it was slowly killing me. Friends and family knew it and would occasionally try to talk to me about it. Deep down, I suppose, I knew it.
There were times over the years where we tried a separation to see if that would improve things and it would get better for a while, but before too long things would be worse than they were before the separation.
It all came to a head last week. After months of thinking and planning, I ended the relationship. On Wednesday, January 7th, I had Bariatric Surgery.
I know it is drastic but my relationship with food was literally killing me. I was 374 pounds on July 17th at my first appointment with the surgeon and 381 pounds on December 17th. I have high blood pressure,high cholesterol and high blood sugar - The Unholy Three. My knees and ankles were starting to hurt. I was becoming a poster boy for a heart attack.
I had tried it all. Atkins. South Beach. L A Weight Loss. The Cabbage Soup Diet.
I could take off the pounds on all of them but they would come piling back on when I slacked off. I had 400 pounds in my sights and it was time to act.
So there you have it. I have gotten a divorce from food. It doesn't mean I have given up on it. I just ended an unhealthy relationship with it and I am staring a new relationship.
I promise to start posting more often gang and, while I also promise I won't turn this in to Billy's Bariatric Blog, I will keep you all updated.
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First of all, Barney Frank has to go. I would feel a little more comfortable if the leader of the congressional committee handing out the money didn't remind me so much of Elmer Fudd.
Someone has to explain to me in really small words why GM had the money to buy Chrysler 2 months ago but now needs a bailout. And, while they are at it, they can also use the same small words to explain why Chrysler needs a bailout since the reason everyone gave for GM wanting to buy Chrysler is because Chrysler had so much cash.
Chrysler CEO Robert Nardelli has to personally call me and convince me there is a good reason why the windshield washer reservoir on my PT Cruiser could not have been designed to hold 1 full gallon instead of 123 ounces . That last 5 ounces in the jug really pisses me off. If they can design wheel bearings that burn up exactly 1,000 miles after the warranty expires, then surely they can find room for 5 more ounces of bug juice.
PICK A F*CKING PRICE FOR A VEHICLE AND SELL IT EVERYWHERE TO EVERYONE FOR THAT PRICE!!
Every UAW member who has spent time sitting on their ass in the Job Bank collecting almost full pay after being laid off will be required to spend an equal amount of time working in a Food Bank so they can see what happens in the real world when people lose their jobs.
All 3 CEO's need to go on national television, explain the difference between the following vehicles and why we need them all:
You get the picture. Designing, building and selling the same car under different names seems pretty wasteful to me.
Ford needs to apologize to Detroit, the State of Michigan and the whole USA. It's not because of their business - it's because of the Detroit Lions.
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Snow on the ground.
Decorative lights in the yards.
Carols playing everywhere.
One employee dead on Black Friday.
We truly know the Christmas season is here when we read the headline "Wal Mart Employee Trampled To Death in Black Friday Store Opening Rush."
Honestly, was anyone surprised when they heard that? It is like reading about a trailer that was demolished by a tornado. They are both tragedies and they both seem inevitable. When I first sat at the computer on Friday morning, I wasn't looking for sales. I wasn't online shopping. I was looking to see if anyone had been injured and - lo and behold - one dead.
Here are some headlines from news stories about the incident:
Video: Police: Crowd at Wal-Mart 'recipe for Disaster' AssociatedPress
The Wal-Mart horror: Store and cops share blame for Black Friday ... New York Daily News
Lawyer: Trampled NY worker lacked crowd training
Evidently this guy is dead because of Wal Mart and or the police. The herd of stampeding morons had nothing to do with it.
I couldn't find one that said "Police lock down Wal Mart and interrogate every customer in the store after incident"
I did, however, find a few headlines that were as inevitable as the incident itself:
Lawyer: Family of Trampled Worker to Sue Wal-Mart Over Death
Father and son sue over injuries from Wal-Mart stampede on Black Friday
It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas...
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The first thing on the list is find the leak and fix it.
The key in each step is knowing when to move on to the next step.
So, here I am, sitting on the fence. We bailed out the financial industry. Was it necessary? I don't know. The popular and supposedly knowledgable opinion at the time was that we would fall into a depression if we didn't. As I said in my comments to John, I am not an economist and I don't really understand the whole picture. Sometimes economists remind me more of meteorlogists than anything else.
However, one thing I do know a few things about is the auto industry. I spent a few year as a front line contact for a Tier1 supplier to The Big Three and they deifinitely know how to waste money.
I have seen hundreds of thousands of dollars (if not millions) spent to change the interior color of a vehicle for a new model year from Black to Ebony.
And then to Midnight Black the following year.
And Charcoal Black after that.
I have seen changes being made to the design of a newly launched vehicle at the same time the first models off the production lines were hitting the dealers showrooms.
The pentagon could take lessons in how to waste money from these guys.
However, I also live in Michigan - a state that would be devastated by the bankruptcy of any one of the trio.
So here I am. Back on the fence and trusting our lawmakers to make the right decisions.
Wondering if it is time to bail out.
Or time to abandon ship.
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President elect Obama is starting to build his staff. His first appointment is Rahm Emanuel as Chief of Staff. Emanuel is well known in Washington for being tough and relentless when it comes to getting what he needs. He IS a pit bull and WITHOUT the lipstick. This choice is making some people in Washington and across the country a little nervous. It has been said that Obama and Emanuel are trying to bring Chicago politics to the White House.
This may be true.
And it is about damn time.
Chicago is “The City that works.” Despite its alleged history of less than perfect elections, nepotism, pandering, corruption and graft, “The Windy City” keeps on rolling. Chicago politics just has a way of keeping things running smoothly. What’s wrong with bringing this to the Oval Office?
Remember when Chicago was nearing bankruptcy and had to be bailed out by a loan from the federal government? You don’t? Oh yeah. That was New York.
Remember when the Bulls won the championship and the city erupted in violence with cars being torched and police cruisers overturned? You don’t? Oh yeah. That was Detroit.
Remember when there were police officers declared not guilty in the beating of a black man and days of race rioting followed? You don’t? Oh yeah. That was Los Angeles.
Remember when Da Mayor wanted to turn a waterfront airport into a park so he had city crews bulldoze the runway in the middle of the night? Now that was Chicago.
And that is the way politics works in Chicago. There is always a way to get things done.
So, a few words of advice to those around the country who are afraid of Obama and Emanuel:
If you plan on getting in the way of change and progress, then you should be afraid.
Be very afraid.
Change is coming and you had better be part of it or be prepared to be bulldozed out of the way…
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While I know that I am not going to sway the vote of anyone that has already chosen their president, I do have some advice for those of you that are undecided. If you are still not sure after 2 years of campaigning, 3 presidential debates and 1 vice presidential debate, then stay home. This is too important to be decided by a last minute coin toss.
There is one place that John McCain won hands down. Saturday Night Live. He cracked me up this past Saturday. He looked more natural delivering those lines than he did in any of the debates.
Wouldn't it be nice if we could roll the two candidates and their running mates into one super president and elect Barjohnjoesar McBambidlin president?
If things turn out the way they are predicted by the "experts", then Obama will be the next president and Democrats will have total control of the House and Senate. I guess G'Dub did accomplish something noteworthy.
While you are waiting for the results, click on the following link to help fill the time. Try and find all the hidden things by rolling your mouse over the whole room. Tip: Open and close the door and the cabinets more than once. http://www.palinaspresident.us/
Finally, the most important thing about this day is --- Happy Birthday Barb!
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Hostage escapes after 8 years in jungle- After being brought up to date on current events, he turned around and headed right back into the jungle.
Palin is 'going rogue,' McCain aide says- Um, isn't that what mavericks do?
Ticker: Glitches plague Obama, McCain- It looks like they finally have something in common.
Prince Harry wants to be helicopter pilot- He has already flown a Nimbus 2000 and a Firebolt playing Quidditch so why not?
Mom crosses U.S. to abandon boy- Only a loving and caring mother would cross the entire length of the country to abandon her child
Town installs 'prostitution' cameras- The income raised from the website could make the speed trap obsolete.
Headless body found in river- Coroner immediately rules out swallowing water as cause of death.
Cops want pay for using computers- Next thing you know they will want to get paid for sitting around eating doughnuts...
Woman killed directing traffic around dog- Ungrateful pooch
From FOXNEWS.com:
Boy, 8, Shoots Self With Uzi at Gun Show- NRA praises him for exercising his 2nd amendment rights
Couple Arrested for Hosting Sex Parties- In my never ending campaign to bring you nothing but the most accurate and reliable news, I vow I will do everything I can to find their address
Doctor Flushes Girlfriend's Head in Toilet - That's pretty shitty. I'll bet she was pissed.
Today's WTF from FOXNEWS.com:
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